Turns out that you are not getting rid of me after all. I have decided to continue doing what I am doing – sharing with you guys and covering local news and events in Webster, Bienville and Claiborne Parishes.
After many sleepless nights and discussions with God, family, friends and colleagues, it became clear to me that I can make a bigger difference and impact right here, right now.
But speaking of sleepless nights…
My kids are having a hard time adjusting back to this school routine.
The other evening, I tried to lay down with them at about 8:30 even though we did not wake up until about 11 o’clock that morning. I never expected them to actually go to sleep, but to maybe get settled for the night at least.
Yea, that did not happen. Bed jumping, giggling, tossing, turning, pillow fights and running in and out of the bedroom commenced for about two hours.
Even though I woke up later than usual that morning, I had a very long and tiring day. So, maybe I lied a little bit when I said I abruptly changed our bedtime to 8:30 just to get into routine – I was actually exhausted.
I am laying there with kids bouncing around, getting up and down and turning my house inside out. As they are coming in and out of the bedroom, I am just lying there, possibly getting a tad frustrated if I am being honest.
But then I heard something- something that I have heard probably a million times before, but for some reason this time it had a different impact.
It was the sound of bare baby feet pitter pattering across our hardwood floor.
I am sure every one of you can relate to certain sounds, smells and evoking certain emotional memories.
Kind of like when I smell Britney Spears’ perfume, “Curious,” it takes me back to sitting in the bleachers at my high school watching a football game on Friday night in 2007. I would have been wearing a blue jean skirt that was way too short with UGG boots that were way too hot. I was definitely sporting over-tweezed eyebrows and frosted eyeshadow that was sure to be smeared all over my face by the end of the night (that stuff never dried).
The difference between that and this sound of baby feet hitting my hardwood floor is that I did not know it at the time I was spraying way too much “Curious” perfume on, that it would forever be registered into my memory bank.
I knew as soon as I heard it that night- the sound of Kameron’s tiny bare feet running down the hall became a permanent part of my memory. It will be one of those sounds for me that brings me back to me laying on the bed that night and feeling utterly exhausted, but overwhelmingly blessed.
The thing with these smells and sounds that evoke such distinct and emotional memories in us, is that we do not know when they are going to find us.
I have very rarely come across anything that smells like 2007 and I may not remember hearing Kameron’s baby feet running around my house for many years to come. I may be a grandmother keeping my grandchildren at home, watching them galavanting and giggling as they play. But I know I will revisit that night one day down the road, and I already cannot wait to relish those memories- memories of being a young mother whose entire life revolved around her children and their entire life revolved around mine.
I will welcome that flood of emotions…. much unlike the memories of scrunching my hair and freezing it into place with all of the hair spray until it looked like a pack of uncooked Ramen noodles. Although, I do not hate being reminded of falling asleep staring at a poster of Justin Timberlake above my bed sporting a hairstyle pretty similar.
(Paige Nash is a wife, mother, publisher of Bienville Parish Journal and Claiborne Parish Journal and a digital journalist for Webster Parish Journal.)